Q: Two of my best friends had a semi-falling out recently. They haven’t given up on each other completely, but it’s really tense and I want to help. What can I do?
Awesomeness continues after advertisement
A: Being stuck in the middle of a conflict is one of the world’s worst feelings, and that’s a fact. It’s especially sad when the tiff is happening between two people you really care about. I’m sure you want things to go back to normal as soon as possible. And the good news is this: you absolutely can help.
But first you have to commit to being an unbiased participant. If you want to bring this fight to a positive conclusion, you cannot take a side. Instead, be a sounding board. Be a sounding board to both of your friends, because I believe that “anger” is just another word for feeling ignored. It could very well be that all either of them needs to do is vent. You can be at the receiving end of it, because you have no reason to be defensive.
Awesomeness continues after advertisement>
Also being unbiased doesn’t mean you can’t offer advice. But the advice can’t prioritize one person’s feelings over another. Encourage them to talk to each other, to write a long email, or to remember a time that the person they’re mad at did something really wonderful for them. You can bring about a resolution just by putting this fight in perspective of a larger and much more important friendship. Whether they realize you were orchestrating it or not, the air will be cleared.
If you need advice, ask your question in the comments, and it may be featured in an upcoming column.
Featured Image Source: Pixabay