Awesome Advice: I’ve Never Had a Boyfriend Before

It's TOTALLY normal

Awesome Advice: I've Never Had a Boyfriend Before


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Q: I’m about to finish my senior year in high school and start college, and, well, I’ve never had a boyfriend before. Although it hasn’t really bothered me before, it seems everyone I know has a boyfriend — or at least dated someone before. Even my younger sister made her relationship Instagram official last week! Now I’m beginning to wonder if there’s something seriously wrong with me because I’ve never been on a real date before. I’m worried I’ll be so behind in relationship stuff and everyone will think I’m a loser once I get to college. Help?

A: OK, first thing’s first: you’re NOT a loser. In fact, you’re totally normal. You might feel like you’re the only girl in the world who’s never had a boyfriend, but believe me, there are more of you single ladies out there. Remember how you mentioned that not having a boyfriend didn’t really bother you before? Well, that’s awesome because it shouldn’t. Here are some reasons why it’s sooooo okay to not have a boyfriend.

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1. You Get to Focus on YOU

When you’re not worrying about impressing a new crush or dealing with the ups and downs of a relationship, you get to focus on yourself — which is awesome. This means you get to figure out what you like, what you’re good at, and what your goals are post-high school.


2. You Get to Focus on Your Squad

The friendships you form in high school have the potential to last a lifetime — a lot longer than the typical high school relationship. Forming strong friendships means you have an amazing support system and also helps strengthens your self-identity. Friendships also allow you to recognize what you don’t and do want in a relationship. Plus they are super fun!


3. You Can Get More Involved

When you’re not in a relationship, you don’t have to divide your time as much, which means you have plenty of opportunity to join extra-curricular activities, including sports, arts and volunteer work. School is the perfect time to try as many activities as possible and discover where your strengths lie, and form new connections.


4. You Can Be Picky

Being picky, when it comes to dating, is a good thing. As you’re enjoying yourself with friends and school, you can observe the guys around you and decide for yourself what you like and what you don’t like in a potential boyfriend. Too many people put up with bad behavior in order to have a relationship or a date to the prom. You’re worthy of having high standards because you deserve the best boyfriend for you.


5. You Can Have Legit Fun

Without a boyfriend, you’re free of drama, anxiety and jealousy that often plagues many relationship. Many young people spend a lot of time worrying about their relationship when that time could be spent going to the movies, hanging with friends, listening to music — basically anything you love to do.


It’s important to remember that you’re worth waaaayyyyy more than your relationship status. It’s so easy to get caught up with fears of being unattractive or weird because you’ve never had a date before. But the truth is your worth isn’t determined by someone else. It’s determined by you. And YOU are amazing — with or without a boyfriend.